Waiting for baby

Waiting, waiting. It is hard to be patient; it is hard not to know what the final outcome of this period will be. With any luck, in a matter of months, weeks - our beautiful, healthy baby boy will be snuggling in his crib in his happy little room. But what if???? In Florida, birthparents have 48 hours after birth to decide to keep their baby or not. Compared to Maine, where this period is extended for months - even after the child's placement in an adoptive home - we are fortunate. But where does that leave us now? Wondering, worrying, waiting - and hoping that fate is on our side and this particular baby will indeed be ours.

But what if the birthmother does change her mind? We know from experience that this can and does happen. I've spoken to couples whose adoptions fell through multiple times.

Of course, they say now, "none of that matters - we have our child(ren) and it all happened the way it was meant to...."

Now, throughout this process, I have been trying to embrace the idea that "our" baby will come to us when s/he is ready, when the planets align, the moon and stars are in fortuitous union and the sun shines down on us just so. But it is unbearably hard at times, because ultimately we have no control.

Just hope.